It's brilliantly twisted. This story takes the innocent Christmas carol we all know and transforms it into something visceral and unforgettable. Turtle doves become massive, violent creatures. French hens aren't what you expect. Every element of the song appears, but darker, stranger, and more dangerous than you could imagine. The journey is relentless. Armed with only a club made from pear tree wood, our hero ventures through deserts, encounters supernatural beings, and faces impossible choices. The desperation is palpable. You'll feel the weight of every step, every decision, every sacrifice.

Private eye Stan Prolongo has pulled off some crazy rescues, but this might be his spiciest yet. When crime boss Big Bob Bamford kidnaps Mrs. Lum Lum and demands ransom, Stan knows he can't play by the rules. Armed with nothing but a sombrero, a fake accent, and some seriously questionable food, he infiltrates Bob's tortilla factory hideout for a daring extraction. What follows is a high-speed chase through industrial machinery, creative uses for broken tortillas, and workplace safety violations that would make OSHA weep. Fast-paced, funny, and featuring the best pun you'll hear all week—this is pulp detective comedy at its finest.

This story is a gift. It's funny, weird, profound, absurd, touching, and completely original. It accomplishes the impossible, making you believe in miracles while laughing at fart jokes. Read it when you need to remember that wonder still exists. Read it when you need to laugh. Read it when you need to believe that ordinary broken things—toasters, microwaves, people—might still have some magic left in them. Toast just happens.

A Tragedy That Could Have Been Prevented This story will break your heart and make you angry. You need to read it anyway. What Happens: A Spanish-speaking woman calls 9-1-1. Her daughter is hemorrhaging after childbirth. She's dying. The mother is frantic, desperate, begging for help in the only language she knows. The operator doesn't speak Spanish. The bilingual operator went home sick early. His replacement is running 15 minutes late. Just 15 minutes. What follows is one of the most gutting, frustrating, heartbreaking pieces of short fiction you'll ever read.

It's absurdly funny. From the first page to the last, this story delivers laugh-out-loud moments that just keep building. A captain who gambles away crew members in poker games? A space monkey named JimJim who communicates through shrieks and gestures? Flamboyant space pirates with pink boas and a guy named Teddy? This story commits to the bit SO HARD. In a world of serious, dark, complex sci-fi, this story is a reminder that space adventures can be joyful, funny, and ridiculously entertaining while still having heart and telling a complete, satisfying story.

At first glance, this looks like a cute story about two kids becoming friends at school. Timmy the orc and Brighteyes the unicorn. They play in the mud, laugh about their day, make plans to hang out. It's sweet. Innocent. Wholesome. You have no idea what's coming. This is a story about cycles of violence. About revenge dressed up as justice. About how trauma and hatred get passed down through generations. About codes of honor that justify horrific acts. And it does all of this in just a few pages, with orcs and unicorns, in a world made of candy. The writing is deceptively simple—which makes the gut-punches land even harder. Every detail matters. Every seemingly throwable line pays off. The author trusts you to piece things together, and when you do, it's devastating.