I have been in therapy on and off for years and I find myself after every session wondering what do I do with these problems now. I spend every week processing my struggles in life for an hour and then suddenly it’s time to leave.

The first strategy I have found helpful is, as soon as my one hour ends, I write down thoughts I didn’t have time to share. A simple list in my phone of bullet points to efficiently prepare for next week’s session.

I have used my quick bullet point method another way, during the other 6 days I make bullet points of my rough and messy thoughts. For example, “Feeling like I’m letting them down.” “Anxiety is high during this event.” “I feel really bad”. These seem like general statements but it can help pinpoint feelings and when the golden hour of therapy arrives each bullet point can help you dive into what surrounds those short statements. This method can also be used to briefly read before your session rather than going through each individual point you have written down the week prior.

Here is your friendly reminder that it is okay to have the same list from last week for this coming week. My last three sessions have been about the same topic and this coming week will most likely be the same. Some would refer to this as “beating the dead horse.” Whatever you call having what feels like the same conversation every week, it is completely normal. You are allowed to talk about whatever you want, how long you need to talk about it.

I have found my healing to be quite a messy process and am proud to share that. Sometimes I have a productive, clear-headed session followed by a messy week, and other times it’s the opposite. We should practice what we learn in therapy but your other six days are not homework, it’s your life. Some weeks might be about continuing the processing and healing while others might be about resting, laughing and enjoying. In my opinion, healing can simply mean just getting through the days. I have lived through the most joyful last two months of my life while actively battling through really deep personal struggles.

Let yourself live your other six days, find things that bring you joy. Remember that there is always another session.