Silent love—

Loud in my chest,

But quiet in your hands.

Pieces scattered before me.

Broken like a vase,

Shattered like glass,

Fragile like both.

Thats me. 

He walked.

I chased. 

He broke up with me,

Yet I collect the mangled pieces— 

to fix it.

Fix what? 

Fix us.

Pain, hurt, regret.

Do you not feel?

Memories, kisses, hugs, videos.

Does that not hurt or does it just hurt for me?

October, November. 

Did those 2 months only mean something to me?

those two months were the best two months of my life—

Thats why it hurt the most.

and for a moment, I finally felt happy,

but now I sleep, cry and wonder why. 

Went from warm hugs and kisses to cold silence and distance.

As if he didn’t speak loud enough this was the loudest. 

No words just pain, just hurt.

Cutting on my body from panic I beg. 

Peace I searched. Fear I cried. God I plead. 

Mercy is no where to be found so I feel—

Feel abandoned once again. 

Then I wondered will I ever find happiness? 

Why does happy last like a season. 

For me it lasted a while. 

Enough to know how to describe it. 

Touch, laugh, eyes, love. Not much but enough. 

Words soft spoken but clear,

He was near. But now? Now I fear. 

Panic I say, Panic? Panic attack. 

Now the man who once made me feel safe felt unsafe. 

My eyes shut and the house burns. 

He’s my home. It burnt down. Gone, He’s gone. 

My home is gone. 

Safety is never permanent for me, It’s temporary. 

Love doesn’t last it eventually crashes. 

Piece together the fallen pieces of this love puzzle.

if you succeed, You’ll get it.  

Get how I feel. 

This unsolvable issue now leaves me. 

Confused, lost, dead, Quiet. 

Something that kills alive a women with love and dignity. 

None left she’s gone. 

Died inside she whispers heal me, save me, see me. 

He did but no one else. 

She says again hear me, help me, notice me. 

Only for him to now look completely away.

That was their end so this is mine.

Love will last forever.

In love will last never.

It’s what I learned from time.

But even when time passes do you still see me?

Can you notice me?

This silent love is like a drug.

But through all of this you felt none.

No pain, no unsafety, no panic, no fear.

So now im here. Silent but in love. 

With you.

Still. Forever.