Many mental health professionals consider BPD one of the most painful mental illnesses because of the sheer intensity of the emotions involved. Those with BPD don’t just feel sadness; they feel crushing despair. They feel the actual weight on their hearts; the breaking pain. They don’t just experience joy; they feel euphoria. Like being high without needing any substances. And they don’t just feel sadness, they feel like they are literally dying. Their emotions are turned up to an unbearable volume, making every interaction, every thought, and every moment feel overwhelming.

DEAR ASK A PUNK - I'm turning 39 this year (much later this year) and my mid-life crisis has arrived. It seems like I was 27 and now I'm a middle-aged man and I don't know what happened in between. I haven't gotten fat, but my hair is falling out. I still listen to punk rock, but I started feeling stupid riding my skateboard in public around the time I turned 32. l still go to shows, but it seems like all the bands suck now compared to what I remember and I want to tell the 20 year-olds that they're getting ripped off, that maybe punk really IS dead that it was co-opted just when we need it most - The country is even more deluded and down the shittier than it was back in the early 80's. ...but I'm just too tired

DEAR ASK A PUNK - I'm a guy and I'm 30 years old and I still live with my parents. It's not as pathetic as it sounds. Where I live (in the semi-deep South) it is expensive to live on your own and even with some college it's tough to find a job that's more like a career and pays well. So I DO work full-time, but at $10/hour with no benefits, you can't exactly LIVE. And I like my family. My folks are still married and since my sisters and brother have moved out, they have more than enough room, in fact they like having me around. It's not a bad lifestyle really. Ok, I don't pay actual "rent", but the house is paid off anyway, and I do contribute, buy groceries, do my own laundry, pay for my own cellphone. I'm saying all this so I don't sound like a loser, but now that I'm 30, ok almost 32, I'm starting to feel like one anyway, but I just don't see any way out...

I wish I could hear the walls. Maybe I'd be able to hear every unspoken word about me. Or maybe id be able to hear everything good about myself that people admire. The way my heart is bigger than my ego. How easily I give into love and how easily it is for people to let me go. But thats not very positive is it?

More questions from parents. I love it. DEAR ASK A PUNK - My kid's band is good, really good I think and I'm not saying that just because I'm his dad. I was in plenty of bands and we always sucked, but these kids are good. I take them to their gigs and see the reaction they get from strangers, not just from their friends. I want to encourage him the way I was never encouraged by my folks but I also know the odds are long that he'll ever make his living punk rockin' out... but I think he would have as fair a shot as anyone. How do I encourage him but keep things realistic? …PunkDAD

The start of it all. Let me introduce you to my crazy life. Ill start by introducing my chaos and loves.

poem/letter to him that i really really wish he could read. it just describes why i broke up with him and why i didn’t tell him the actual reason.

"What is love? You find it's a small, winged animal trapped inside your chest, its varied beats signaling pain, thrill, or new passion. While some friends dismiss love quickly, 'falling in and out faster than a fumbling quarterback gets sacked,' and others grasp in vain, you eventually discovered love isn't easy, but it led you to your true soulmate."

What is this?! A fresh, current journal entry?!?! Will the wonders never cease? Today’s entry is fresh of the press and addresses my current emotional state.

Greetings dear readers. Wow. That didn't take long: AAP is already getting complaints ! DEAR ASK A PUNK - I've read all of your posts. Seems like you mostly only answer questions from men, and it looks like ALL of your posts only answer questions from Hetero people. What's up with that? …Questioner

I wrote this poem trying to describe how an unfortunate scenario caused someone I felt like I loved more than anything to fall for someone else and in that cause a chain reaction for me to have to settle for someone that wasn't her, but because of it I'd become broken, to broken to love someone, but also to broken to be able to be in a situation to ever be with her again even after she realized that who she chose over wasn't who she wanted. I'm still pretty young so I know it's probably bad but I figured this is a good way to vent.

Nobody talks about it. You have started your family. You have grown your family. You have finished your family...but your heart is never done. Praying that "because I had a thought" pregnancy test is negative but broken when it is...

My Heart knew what it Wanted, but not what it Needed, and now that My Heart has what it Needs, it can hardly Believe It.

Welcome! I am a step and Bio parent and my journey feels anything but normal my first Note is about a few things I've run into and an intro to the beginning of it all. Pop on in and take a look at this hotmess express.

This is another journal entry I failed to publish in a timely fashion. Though the extreme emotions I portray in this particular entry have somewhat lessened, they are nonetheless a persistent feeling.

Blake, consumed by a love with Ethan, believed he could heal Ethan’s pain. Their relationship, marked by passion and despair, spiraled into a beautiful decay, leaving Blake empty and drowning in love’s poison.

A lovely night under the sun, can’t beat how many times you beat your meat, just for me to come home and I say ‘no’ to you. If it will be, then let matters be.

There’s this girl who’s scared to love again. A girl who was hurt in her part relationship. A girl who doesn’t trust anyone again. However, a guy…. A guy came and loved her slowly.

This is another old journal older journal entry I am posting now as I am not in the mood to write a new one.

It’s been a minute, but here is a fresh journal entry! I literally just finished writing this one, so the pain is very fresh and current this time.