I startled myself awake suddenly and threw both hands on my head. I huffed forced breaths in panic. I was sure that I was close to another panic attack. I cried for a moment as I did every morning. For the last thirteen years, I had been re-visiting the night of my mother's death. I had been foolish enough to at least hope and pray that it wouldn’t happen on my eighteenth birthday. I won’t ever escape this, I thought to myself as I did my best to catch my breath. Mother Cerridwen was still punishing me, of course. Not that I could blame her; I was still a naughty witch playing around with dark light.

I knew what I saw last night but I had no idea why it happened. It just didn’t make sense. For countless birthdays, I have tried to get answers in hopes to either discovering the truth of the matter or to even bring her back using the dark spells from my Grandfather Riccardo’s Grimoire. As his Grimoire explained, however, using dark light came with consequences. I knew I was suffering under those consequences by the nightly terrors I experienced since that very night.

If my mother died as my father had insisted, I would have been able to bring her back to life with my spells. Location spells didn’t even work so I knew there was powerful, dark magick at play. There just had to be. I knew my mother was alive and was probably being held captive somewhere. I was frustrated nonetheless and tonight, I planned on casting a bigger spell. It was more dangerous, and I was aware of the possible risks, but I would do anything to bring my mother back and discover what truly happened that night. Whatever it took. Despite all my failed attempts and past injuries from difficult spells, I will never stop trying to find you, mama.