INTRODUCTION: ME & MAGICK UP TO THIS POINT

I’m Nicholas Melville, but I tend to go by Nick, although I really have no preferred way of being referred to, but I’m a person who’s passionate about love, music, philosophy, and exponentially furthering a sustainable enlightenment for myself and others. I’m in construction and mechanical maintenance but I also love writing, singing, the outdoors, and learning.

I follow no path but that which is ahead of me, I have no bounds to any but all, I’m constantly shifting and evolving but also remaining true to my spirit, I’m attempting to understand my true Will, and working on manifestation currently. I love reading, but I love reading about things like theology, philosophy, mythology, history, and religious interpretations aligned with esoteric belief.

I meditate, I read. My prayers are more based in pure faith, I don’t worship any tradition. Certain deities hold places of respect, but I try not discount the ones that don’t. I was baptized catholic as a baby and raised such until about 10, then my parents split and when I went to live with my mom she started practicing Christianity, which I honestly only ever appreciated the amount of positivity and uplifting the church we went to tried to propagate. My spiritual journey is one of ambiguity, but of a powerful faith nonetheless. Now I realize it’s never been a resentment of any faith that someone has, or even necessarily a religious sect at all, but any resentment I had towards the experience was one of self loathing. Of the message not resonating with me, so how could it for they?

I spent my teenage years delving into all sorts of spiritual, philosophical, mythological, esoteric, and historical literature. That and partying extremely hard and not really leading my best life, but nonetheless the experiences I had were both memorable and many times transcendent and enlightening. Sometimes from experiencing the exact opposite of those sensations would I eventually arrive to that lesson of evolution.

But I evolved by 18 into a person enthused and in embrace of existence, of experience, and of growth however that could come. My ears of Understanding began to open to the lips of wisdom. From that point forward I did manage to approach spiritual development from that of a scholarly perspective. And I became more open to the fact that these experiences were undoubtedly occurring, so why not learn all I can in an attempt to perhaps understand our even become acquainted with “it”, the feeling, the divine.

Whatever paths my psyche takes me down on the spiritual plane, I can say one thing that’s remained consistent is my respect in a force greater than my own, or anything else I could possibly imagine. So that’s where I say faith is present in my soul, my mind, and my body.

I essentially induced myself into somewhat of a spiritual and mental coma around 21 though, basically began to neglect these aspects of my existence until it became too late in a sense. Years began to go by as it became more and more habitual to neglect these essential qualities of character as long as my physical existence was doing “all right”.

I had been drinking pretty badly and not maintaining my mentality or my spirituality for quite some time by 23. I had made bad choices and ended up dealing with the consequences for years, and had fallen into a depression, which eventually turned into the spiritual coma I referred to.

I’m fortunate in a way that I was able to recognize to my issues by 25 and begin to put them in check, and by 27 actually being able to say that I had stopped drinking completely out of recognition of my inability to manage it. I couldn’t moderate it effectively and it wasn’t bringing anything to my life. No joy, no excitement, no empowerment, nothing. Anything I had attributed to it was all within me, and it’s existence had become stagnated and decayed within my own and was passing that decay onto my soul and my mind, and undoubtedly my body as well.

These consequences I refer to had me flushing through the “legal system” for years, bad decisions had to be reconciled, and so they were. I now recognize that was due to my own stupidity, and I endured a lot of the different veins of “programs” they had to offer during my tenure in “the system”. I hold no real resentments, and any that do exist are frivolous and I got experience satisfaction to their end, so I have moved on with dignity in tact and actually better for it, in a way.

I wouldn’t attribute it to luck, but to the determination I had shown in the past combined with the determined General themes of my upbringing. Those being that of support, being in tune with one’s self, and doing the best one can. Regardless of the extreme and intense turbulence I had experienced as a child, my parents really did do the best they could, being that they were essentially just trying to figure out existence just as I am now with the tools they were given, doing the best of their ability.

I’ve awakened my self to be more in tune with my mind, body, and soul over the last year and a half, it’s been quite a journey, and so much has happened… It’s hard putting into words. I had a moving experience inspired by music and a quest for knowledge that helped me to wake up, to realize that I wanted to wake up is the sensation I attribute to the initial revelation. But it was essentially a song in the night that led me back to the light, and also woke me up enough that I was able to immediately reflect upon what had happened, as if Journaling a dream as soon as you rise.

Lately I’ve been dreaming, and I have been dreaming more vividly, I have sleep problems, sometimes my dreams are hard to remember. But I’m intrigued because I have been feeling something pulling, and right now I’m sort of a rebirth, phase of existence, I feel my ego has started anew. So I’m listening. I’m feeling. I’m reflecting. I’m attempting to take in all the universe has to offer, the currents ever flowing with our own currents either with their sweep or against it. These dreams aren’t just of the physical plane, not just of material desires, they seem to be over-laid with a spiritual essence, almost imbued with an intent and desire of its own. Perhaps it’s faith rekindling a fire that had been snuffed out for years.

The now is the only time we actually get, all else is still centered upon the now. It branches from the now. All the past is simply what led us to now, and the future is simply what we decide to do with the now. But control doesn’t not exist in the now. Be your own God, and by that allow the divine energy to channel through you, BE YOU, and seize the now as the opportunity it is.

I feel it’s also important not to rush whatever final outcome one decides is their desire, or their will and intent. Realize purpose, and then follow through. Embrace passion and follow through. The follow through is what’s going to manifest the desired outcome. The magic is within every one of us. Every man and woman is a star.