Let me start by clarifying something. This is not a book or a story. this is not something that I am making up as I go along or something that I even have to stop and consider what to say. The words that I am putting out here for all to see are my actual real life in dealing with (what I have named) my addictive depression.

Another one. Why won't it end already? It's always the same. I spend my entire day lost in my thoughts about how I will end it once and for all. And about how happy I will be, what I do, where I will go, and who I will see. Then I remember.... Im me and that is not what is planned for me.