Oh please, hold me softly and caress my fur. I didn't mean to bite you, I was so stupid when I was younger. I hope you can forgive me. This post is about regret.

Hello! Let me sit you down, have a cup of tea. I'll caress your shoulders with my fluffy paws as my warm breath that I cannot control hits the hair of your neck. I can't control it, for my comfort has it's cons and it's pros. You will feel comfortable for a little while, then the idea of a dog speaking to you will hit you as a brick hits a old man working on a house.